A man walks into a near-empty diner late at night. A tired-looking, busty waitress saunters over and pours him a coffee.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cJust you and me tonight, huh?\u201d she mutters.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He scans the chalkboard above the register:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Toast \u2013 $2 He looks up slowly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cTherapy\u2026 is that your department?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n She chuckles darkly. \u201cI give it better than any shrink.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n She starts removing her gloves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n He says, A man walks into a near-empty diner late at night. A tired-looking, busty waitress saunters over and pours him a coffee. \u201cJust you and me tonight, huh?\u201d she mutters. He scans the chalkboard above the register: Toast \u2013 $2BLT \u2013 $5“Midnight Wrist Therapy” \u2013 $13 He looks up slowly. \u201cTherapy\u2026 is that your department?\u201d She […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":867,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[43],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-866","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-funny-jokes"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/866","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=866"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/866\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":868,"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/866\/revisions\/868"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/867"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=866"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=866"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=866"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
BLT \u2013 $5
“Midnight Wrist Therapy” \u2013 $13<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cGreat. Wash your hands. I need that BLT more than a breakdown.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"