{"id":956,"date":"2026-02-04T12:12:59","date_gmt":"2026-02-04T17:12:59","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/?p=956"},"modified":"2026-02-04T12:13:00","modified_gmt":"2026-02-04T17:13:00","slug":"the-hotel-clerk-upgraded-me-for-a-strange-reason","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/?p=956","title":{"rendered":"The Hotel Clerk Upgraded Me \u2014 For a Strange Reason"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cYou\u2019ve been selected for a complimentary suite,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I never get upgrades.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When I opened the door, she was already inside \u2014 leaning against the desk like she owned the room.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cYou looked like you needed a better night,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cHow did you get in here?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">She held up a master key.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cAnd I don\u2019t usually offer the <em>full<\/em> upgrade,\u201d she added, locking the door behind her.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u201cYou\u2019ve been selected for a complimentary suite,\u201d she said. I never get upgrades. When I opened the door, she was already inside \u2014 leaning against the desk like she owned the room. \u201cYou looked like you needed a better night,\u201d she said. \u201cHow did you get in here?\u201d She held up a master key. \u201cAnd [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":957,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[43],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-956","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-funny-jokes"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/956","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=956"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/956\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":958,"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/956\/revisions\/958"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/957"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=956"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=956"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themodemuse.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=956"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}